It's All About Tone of Voice and the Words We Use

Your Mom was right. It's not always what you say, but how you say it.
Next to "Nancy, what's the best way to answer a phone?" the second most often asked question is "Nancy, how important is the tone of voice?"
Answer: VERY.
Several times I've been told things that weren't that bad; however, the tone of voice and the words were so wrong. I walked away not wanting to do business with that company anymore.
True Story: After purchasing an item in a store recently, at the check out counter the clerk told me the amount and I wrote the check. He took it and looked up my account on his database. Without looking up at me he said, "If you're gonna write a check, I have to see a picture ID."
The "TONE" he used was very threatening in my perception. (And perception is reality.) I'd been a customer with them a long time and this was the first time I'd been asked for ID. I immediately made a decision not to return there any more. Why? Because of his tone of voice and the words he used.
There were several ways he could have told me he needed an ID. Especially since he saw from the database (which he found prior to my handing him the check) I had been at that store many times before.
He could/should have said, (with a SMILE, which changes the TONE) "Mrs. Friedman, I see you're on the database and shop here often. Most folks know you on sight. I've only been here three days and haven't met everyone yet. If I can get your driver's license this time, next time I'll recognize you."
Gosh, you can feel the difference just by reading the words. More importantly, you could HEAR the difference in his TONE.
On the other hand, I went into the jewelry store the other day to pick up an item. When I said to the owner, who does know me, that I was here to pick up my watch, I could sense he seemed to blank out on my name. With a big smile he said, "Good, glad to get it. By the way, which name will that be under?" Great save and a class act.
Practice on finding the most positive tone and words when you talk with customers. And yes, smiling will help you with the tone!
Nancy Friedman is president of Telephone Doctor, a customer service training company in St. Louis. Telephone Doctor has helped over 22,000 organizations improve the way they communicate with customers. For information, visit www.telephonedoctor.com.