Editor's note: Today we are rerunning one of favorite Sue Haviland columns. We hope you enjoy it.
Every once in a while I get a slew of questions and comments centered on the family members of the seniors. And yes you guessed it, those questions and comments are about the kids.
Let's face it; we all have to be able to communicate with the children of our senior clients on some reverse mortgage transactions. And yes, it can be a struggle sometimes, but it doesn't have to be. What if you could turn those kids around and actually have them facilitate that reverse mortgage as your ally?
More often than not, I get the comment that the kids are just a bunch of greedy so-and-so's and there's just not much you can do about it.
I beg to differ. If you take the time to educate the children of the senior, you may find out that they don't have the full picture. At first blush, it may sound like they are feeling that their inheritance is being threatened by the reverse mortgage. Even worse, they are concerned that they are going to owe a big debt after mom or dad pass away. Don't dismiss these concerns.
While there is no law guaranteeing any of us an inheritance from our parents, many children assume that they will receive something from mom and dad. The reality may come as a disappointment, but don't allow it to derail the transaction for you.
I find that when this happens, usually the kids don't have a clear picture of mom and dad's situation. And when you point out the options other than a reverse (mom and/or dad move in with them) suddenly the reverse mortgage becomes a viable choice.
I usually suggest a conversation (in person is best but not always possible) to educate all family members on the reverse mortgage and its benefits. In particular, I emphasize the non-recourse component which can protect the heirs in the future.
A discussion on this safety net that is such an important part of the reverse mortgage product will often leave the children feeling more comfortable. It will also show that you are taking their concerns into account and want them to have a full understanding of the program.
Consider posting a video on your website that addresses the questions most commonly asked by the children. The family will get to "know" you even thought they never meet with you in person.
Take the time to listen to what the kids have to say and more often than not, you'll find that an education on the product will turn them around and they'll become an asset instead of a liability. In the long run, they usually do want what's best for mom and dad.
Sue Haviland is a reverse mortgage consultant in Baltimore and the founder of Reverse Mortgage Success, a leader in the training and education for originators around the country in the rapidly growing reverse mortgage arena. Ms. Haviland has worked in the lending industry since 1981. She has been originating reverse mortgages for the last six years and still originates loans every day. She has helped hundreds of families all over the country in the last several years. Sue also shares her knowledge of this market in presentations before the Women's Council of Realtors, Mortgage Bankers Association, National Association of Professional Mortgage Women, and SRES - Senior Real Estate Specialists, Brian Sacks' Insider Seminars, as well as the public. Sue is a Certified Senior Advisor and is active in many professional organizations. Sign up for her free seven-part mini-course at
